It really feels like I've lost the past two years. Since Momma died in May2006, I haven't been able to think straight. I have given birth twice and nursed both babies since then, but my mind has not been clear. I have not been able to put together a cohesive sentence and that was made plain last night.
I went to a home group last night at a friend's house. We were asked to talk about what was going on spiritually in our lives and I couldn't make anything make sense. I rambled on about Greg and I both being at home, but that is not the real issue. I am hurting for my family members Ashley and Clint because they lost their baby. It probably hurts so much because it reminds me of how I felt after Momma died. That was such a shock to my system and to be really honest, I thought that I had grieved and gone on. But I guess not.
So, after we shared, we were asked to pray for the person next to us. I rambled on again. I only got one word -- Peace -- and tried to minister it over her, but how can I minister peace when I am such a mess.
It is absolutely ridiculous that my emotions are such a wreck!! I am getting so tired of this rollercoaster ride, but I don't know how to get off.
